Rent Boys for Defence Aunties
I know I'm supposed to be blogging about the nomination of Syed Yusuf Raza Gilani for the post of Prime Minister. But I just cannot be asked, particularly as you can read his profile here, the supposed inevitability of his nomination here (or alternatively how he was a dark horse here), and watch him backhand fondle his way to second base with Sherry Rehman here or here.
Instead, on this fine Sunday evening and in keeping with my supposedly heathen ways, I have elected the blogging gutter and will post the following flyer, copies of which were apparently being thrown into cars in Defence. It reads:
Instead, on this fine Sunday evening and in keeping with my supposedly heathen ways, I have elected the blogging gutter and will post the following flyer, copies of which were apparently being thrown into cars in Defence. It reads:
"Breast ko purkashish banane ke liye: Breast Developing Massage."The service providers are are mindful of their clients concerns about being caught by their husbands/fathers and offer reassurance, stating:
"Afzaish Nasal ki pecheidgi se bachne ke liye ala imported condom ki suhoolat bhi maujood hai."Also, they add hopefully:
"Aap 2 larkyon kay group ki soorat mein bhi mujh se rabta kar sakti hein."Lovely. I suppose you cant fault them for their elaborate scheme to get laid, but to have the audacity to charge for it, I mean really. And how the hell would a guy throw this flyer into a parked car? Doesnt that translate into a risk (bordering on certainty) that at some point he was going to get his ass kicked? There are indeed many unanswered questions. Frankly this whole story as it stands shouldn't be taken at face value (except for the fact that the flyer exists, and that someone somewhere at some point wants/wanted keenly to satiate his "jinsi zarooriyaat" without further self indulgence).
Consequently, I am going to try to get one of the co-authors of this blog to do some investigative work and dial the number and see what happens. If either of you are reading this, do not dial from your regular mobile or land line. It could be a sting. And know that in Central Jail, 'Ladies Body Massages' are mandatory. Even if you're not a lady.
36 comments:
Im so scandalized. Oh my God. I think I need to lie down.
HAHAHAHAHAH!!This is unbelievable.
I'm now going to go and scandalise my office. Thank you so much NB.
This is just can't be true. It's just too dangerous. Moreover Defence Aunties are much too used to 'having fun' with high school kids than to bother with a professional. NB don't try to hide your illustrious past - we all know what you were getting up to at Tubby Auntie's house during those lusty summer days!
What tubby Auntie you bastard. There were also hot ones. Your face is a lusty summer day.
Quit squabbling you two and start calling that number. I need to know who picks up.
Yaar i dont want to call it. My visa will get revoked.Tell AKS to call it. He doesnt even have a visa (HA!)
No visa? What a loser!
i'm going to call. i have a calling card for pakistan. i'm going to go to a public telephone (not use my cell because the number is still traceable) and then call. this is truly brilliant.
wow
ahsan, please report your findings asap!
okay i take that back. apparently i'm calling them....nb, i;m awaiting instructions...
Oh my God this is too exciting. Kudos to the brave Rs. 5 investigative team for putting life outside the central jail on the line and calling. Waiting for minute by minute reports of the call!
so. i've been calling for a good 20 minutes. guy has his cellphone off. on the flyer it says i should leave an sms if its off, so clearly this is part of his crazy plan somehow. nb and ahsan, what next?
i'm quite sad, i practiced and everything!
i had a sneaking suspicion this would happen (the cell phone being off bit). i agree with you; it is sad. frankly i don't know how we can proceed from here. NB and AKS, any ideas?
one idea is to get a new prepaid SIM card and sms this person. if you can get someone else's NIC to obtain the connection that would be a bonus (considering everyone's drivers and the drivers' servant has a brokerage account at the KSE a SIM card should be a relatively straightforward process).
also, after a min of googling it seems 0344 is a telenor prefix and the first digit being a 4 means its from lahore. that kind of figures as lahore is rather well known for these "services" than Karachi (seems like the guy is looking to expand into new markets). if someone knows someone at telenor see what they can gather about the account. privacy laws be damned!!!
I think this is some sort of a social experiment by a very very very khwar person to see how many other very khwar people are out there in pakistan that will call/sms this person. the whole thing sounds extremely bogus to me.
My final comment is “don’t waste the time, dear, don’t waste the time”
This post made my day :) As exciting as the flyer and everything it promises may be, it definitely sounds like some bogus scheme to obtain cell phone numbers (especially those belonging to sad little naive women - or men even). Or maybe it's practical joke? If only...
Well, theres no response. So its either a practical joke, or the flyer is too dated.
Alas.
aww.. i wanted to know what a porkashish breast looked like!
anon956:
there's websites for that, you know. a somewhat less convoluted avenue to your destination than our elaborate scheme.
Well i called in the number and a woman picked up the fone kept saying hello hello and a voice of a younger girl from behind asking something... i just said hello once as i didnt want to talk keun k bhai i am a boy and this was apparently for girls or ladies... and i m not good at mocking a lady's voice... so yeah this number works... it work at 7.30 pm PST. I am in germany tho so no problem with tracing.... its a pity really i cudnt talk. and guys where is this number from? cuz i heard k u can tell where this number belongs to karachi ya lahore?
@Anonymous
Man, much respect for following through with it when all of us had given up. When we tried we couldnt get through, and no one responded to our texts.
I am encouraged by your success, and will try again and continue to do so periodically until I get through. Our Poshida Rent boys wills not evade the mildly disturbing curiousity of fiverupees.
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Oh for fucks sake, can we please somehow ban any further comments on this post? And the other aunty sex post too? I think we've all had quite enough.
whoa! seriously.
or maybe exercise comment moderation for a change?
I like the fact that we still draw horny commenter to this blog. Comment moderation be damned!
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