Programming Note: Liveblogging Spain-Honduras Tomorrow (But With A Twist)

Greetings, loyal readers. I have not been able to blog in the last few days for a couple reasons, but suffice it to say, I've missed you too.

Anyway, just letting the footie fans out there know that tomorrow there will be a live blog of the Spain-Honduras game on Rs.5, only none of the regular contributors will be doing it. Instead, we have a guest blogger, friend of Rs.5 and long time commenter, JJY (my college roommate and still good friend) taking the reins. I must take this opportunity to emphasize that JJY invited himself.

Urgent: Please Read This Post If You're Participating In The Rs.5 World Cup Bracket

Okay, I'm really happy with the response rate but there's a minor complication which a reader's comment alerted me to. Namely, the ability to track people down if they actually win.

Now, for many of the people who sent in predictions, they either used Google accounts (which makes them trackable) or I know them personally (which also makes them trackable). But there are a select few who fall into neither category. So if you are any of the following, please send me an email to fiverupeesadmin AT googlegroups DOT com, and simply identify yourself with your pseudonym:

1. Lahori
2. Disfigured corpse
3. ADBC
4. Ahad
5. KP_Red_Devil
6. McPhisto
7. Zozo

Please do this as soon as possible. Thank you.

Here Are My World Cup Predictions. Where Are Yours?

With the World Cup just two weeks away, it's time to put in some predictions. I'm always wrong with this stuff, but it never stops me from trying. Before I detail some of the choicest tidbits here, a quick note: I want to run a type of mini-competition amongst footie fans from the Rs.5 readership. There are basically thirty one spots open to prediction if you leave out the permutations of the third- and fourth-place teams in each of the groups in the first round. I am also leaving out the 3rd place playoff because bronze medals are for losers.

So yeah, there are 31 spots open for prediction. All you have to do is number your teams the way I have done it here. This part is crucial: your number 1 should be the winner of group A, number 2 the runner of Group B and so on. Just follow my lead by looking at the table below, and filling it in with your own predictions.

Then, either in the comments or in an email to fiverupeesadmin AT googlegroups DOT com, send me a numbered list that looks like:

1. France
2. Nigeria
3. England
4. Serbia
.
.
.
31. Spain

or whatever. You can add your justifications and whatever, but that part is optional. All you have to do to partake in the competition is give me thirty one numbered teams. And you must do so before a ball is kicked; the competition closes at the exact moment the World Cup begins. Who knows, I might even give a prize to the winner (maybe).

So get cracking with your predictions and send them in. You can find the groups by clicking here.

Anyway, here is my bracket:

ROUND OF 16	QUARTER FINALS	SEMIFINALS	FINAL	CHAMPION
1. Winner of Group A—Mexico 2.Runner up of Group B—South Korea	17.Mexico 18.Germany	25.Germany 26.Brazil	29.Brazil 30.Spain	31.Brazil
3.Winner of Group C—England 4.Runner up of Group D—Germany
5.Winner of Group E—Holland 6.Runner up of Group F—Paraguay	19.Holland 20.Brazil
7.Winner of Group G—Brazil 8.Runner up of Group H—Chile
9.Winner of Group B—Argentina 10.Runner up of Group A—Uruguay	21.Argentina 22.Serbia	27.Argentina 28.Spain
11.Winner of Group D—Serbia 12.Runner up of Group C—USA
13.Winner of Group F—Italy 14.Runner up of Group E—Denmark	23.Italy 24.Spain
15.Winner of Group H—Spain 16.Runner up of Group G—Cote d’Ivoire

The highlights for me:

• France failing to get out of the group stages for the second time in three World Cups. Do not, I repeat, do not sleep on Mexico and Uruguay. You do so at your peril; I watched plenty of the South American and Central American qualifiers, and trust me, neither team is to be messed with. Plus, France just suck. I mean, they're just a terrible team, with a terrible coach, and overrated players. I am very confident about this one. They're out.

• Two tasty all-South American round of 16 clashes. The first between Argentina and Uruguay and the second between Brazil and Chile. Argentina beat Uruguay by a single goal twice in the qualifers, the second time under considerable pressure (in Uruguay, when a draw or defeat could've meant missing the World Cup). But they're more settled now, and I don't see Uruguay having enough to get by them. As for the second game, as much as I love Chile's sexy 3-3-1-3 formation, they got laced 7-2 on aggregate against Brazil in the qualifiers, and I see that trend holding up too. Also, the Brazil-Chile game will be the most entertaining of this round. Remember I said this.

• If it's a contrast in styles you want, watch the Denmark-Italy game. Denmark are actually quite an exciting team to watch based on the little I've seen them play in the last couple of years. Trust Italy to ruin the fun with a 1-0 win, the goal a freaky one that takes a deflection off a set piece in the 78th minute.

• By the way, I see Serbia ruining England's World Cup dream...indirectly. You see, I'm predicting Serbia win their group, pushing Germany down to the runners up spot, so that they play England in the first knock out stage. England may be better on paper, but in big tournaments, I'll take the Germans over the English every day. Some teams just know how to play and win big matches. Germany is one of those teams. England is not. Bye, bye Don Fabio.
  

• The two most interesting quarter finals for me will be between Holland and Brazil, and Italy and Spain. I expect the bad guys to win one (Brazil) and the good guys to win the other (Spain). Meanwhile, Argentina and Germany beat a pair of teams that have realistically reached their ceiling by getting to the quarters: Serbia and Mexico, respectively.

• In the semis, Brazil beat Germany, who simply aren't good enough. And Spain beat Argentina in the game of the tournament, where Messi and Di Maria put the fear of God into Spain (whose one vulnerability is down the flanks) before ultimately bowing out because of some idiotic substitution by Maradona. We get our dream final: Brazil vs Spain.

• Spain are exactly the type of team Brazil love to beat. They'll sit back, absorb, wait, wait, wait some more, and then pounce. Think Inter-Barca first leg to see what I mean. Brazil will have 40% of the ball but 75% of the goals. Children everywhere will cry, including Brazilians, who wonder what the hell Dunga has done to their team, they barely recognize it anymore, before someone politely tells them that Brazil haven't played "like Brazil" since 1982.
  

Alright, now it's your turn. Remember, numbered teams to 31, either in the comments below or in an email to fiverupeesadmin AT googlegroups DOT com. Go for it.

Other random predictions

• Most annoyingly played up thing by the media who have nothing else to write about in the week before the games begin: those horns that make it sound like the stadium has been invaded by bees. Trust me, by June 11, you would've heard the word "vuvuzela" about 8204343299048 times.

• Top scorer: David Villa

• Most heartbroken team: Spain.

• Team everyone is happy is kicked out when they are because their media is starting to bug the hell out of everyone: tie between England and USA.

• Biggest disappointment (team): Portugal, who fail to win a single game.

• Biggest disappointment (player): Wayne Rooney, who gets a red card at the wrong time. Again.
  

• Most outrageous quote: Diego Maradona, in the couple days off between the group stages and the first knockout stage.
  

• Possible subjects of said quote: Pele's sexuality, racism in South Africa, the backward nature of Uruguayans, or a reporter's sister.

• Best feud: pick two, any two, players from Holland.

• Best friendship: Pique and Fabregas, who make Spain even more suffocatingly likable.

• Most awkward moment: when British tabloids reveal that John Terry's wife has been having an affair with his Chelsea teammate Michael Ballack. Ballack confirms the rumors before the England-Germany game, saying "Well, I broke my ankle and am sitting here in London, and I had to help my team somehow...plus, I always kinda liked Wayne Bridge.

UPDATE: If you contributed predictions under the pseudonyms of any of the following, please email me as soon as possible at fiverupeesadmin at googlegroups dot com:

1. Lahori
2. Disfigured corpse
3. ADBC
4. Ahad
5. KP_Red_Devil
6. Mcphisto
7. Zozo

Thank you.

Barcelona 1 - Internazionale 0 (2-3 on aggregate): The Dream Is Over (Updated)

I have a very painful feeling in the pit of my stomach right now and am hurting considerably, but I am of the view that if I'm around in the good times I should man up and write a post when Barca lose (even though they won 1-0 today, but you know what I mean). Below are some disjointed thoughts, and please keep in mind that I'm upset right now, so I reserve the right to change my mind on some things later.

1. Inter were the better team over 180 minutes. There is no getting around this fact: they deserved to go through. They did all the hard work in the first leg -- very rarely does a team score three goals in one leg of a Champions League semifinal and not go through. The difference between 2-1 and 3-1...hell, I don't even know what the appropriate metaphor would be. But it wasn't 2-1, it was 3-1. And scoring two goals against this Inter team, coached by Jose Mourinho, featuring seven hard-ass South Americans whose sole purpose is to stop you scoring (Julio Cesar, Maicon, Lucio, Samuel, Zanetti, Motta, Cambiasso, not to mention Chivu)? Highly unlikely. I knew as much before the game; I had watched them against Chelsea (both legs) and watched Barca's first leg and knew that finding a way through would be nigh on impossible. Not twice. And so it proved.

2. There is plenty of talk out there about Inter's "tactical brilliance". This is one of pet peeves with football "analysis". Putting ten men behind the ball and having them organized is not a measure of tactical brilliance. It is justified, and it is to be admired if done right under the circumstances (as it was today), and so on, but please don't confuse it for tactical brilliance.

Funnily enough, I thought the actual tactical brilliance from Inter came in the first leg. There they left Milito and Sneijder far enough up the pitch such that Pique, Puyol and Busquets were always fearful of the counter, and thus could not join in the attacks as they did today (substitute Puyol for Yaya). They also took care to not press Barca in the middle of the park, which so many teams try to do before getting ripped apart with their slick passing. No, they made a very conscious decision at the San Siro to press Barca only in the final third, to conserve energy but also to frustrate Barca. It worked, and they nicked three goals to wit (that one of them was off-side is neither here nor there).

But repeat after me: putting. ten. men. behind. the. ball. is. not. tactical. brilliance.

3. The game was supposed to be 90 minutes but it only ended up being about 55 thanks to Inter's time-wasting. I suppose I should hate the game and not the player, but really, this was so egregious. Maicon, Samuel, and Lucio were the biggest offenders. Is it a surprise that Jose Mourinho coached teams all seem to do the same disgusting things? No. But it doesn't make it less galling.

4. A couple of points about Sergio Busquets. He is a cheat -- a diving, play-acting cheat. He embodies everything about FC Barcelona, except exactly the opposite. I don't want to spend too much time on this. I just hope Pep really sorts him out. He's still young, and I have hope that he will learn. But right now, he's a disgusting footballer.

But please keep in mind that while his rolling around was disgusting, Motta was already on a yellow and would've got sent off anyway because a hand to the face is a yellow. He would've missed the final either way too. So please relax on that front. And Motta had it coming to him -- him and Bayern's Van Bommel are the prototypical "we do a lot of shit off the ball and kick everything that moves and are basically thugs but we seem to get away with it an awful lot" guys. So he gets no sympathy from me. (Ironically, both Motta and Van Bommel were important cogs in the Ronaldinho Barca teams).

5. On Ibra and Henry: well, can't say Ibra disproved his doubters today. He held the ball up well, but he also was a non-factor in the box. The simple fact is that Ibra was bought to break Chelsea-style buses. Barca faced a Chelsea-style bus today. And the only time they looked like breaking it is when Ibra was replaced by a nineteen year old kid who looks twelve. I'd say that's pretty damning. He's scored a lot of goals (more than Eto'o) and provided a lot of assists (more than Eto'o) this year, so I'm not saying the transfer was a "mistake". I'm just saying some tough questions have to be asked given the circumstances.

And Henry? When Pep puts you behind Bojan and Jeffren, I'd say that's a pretty good indication that your career for big teams is over. Not that we needed another reminder, but still. Barca need an attacking midfielder/winger who can score goals in the worst possible way this summer. Whether it's David Silva or Cesc Fabregas or Luis Suarez or Angel di Maria or whoever -- they need another goal-scorer.

6. The refereeing in the two legs was quite crap, but it was quite crap for both teams, so no one can complain.

7. You stay classy, Jose. I mean, just look at his reaction after the game. It's pathetic. It's so, so pathetic. It always has to be about him. Winning or losing, home or away, he can never be gracious. Look at him poking his nose in Guardiola's business. Who does that?

I know there are people out there who like Mourinho for all this stuff, but I can't see why. You can be cunning and employ gamesmanship or what not, but to have such little class is really unseemly. It really is. He is a disgusting human being.

8. Pique, you beauty. He really has become Barca's third most important player, after Xavi and Messi. He can do it all, including, evidently, playing center forward. Watching him in these two legs, and watching him keep Ronaldo in his pocket in the Clasico, and watching him against Chelsea and United last year and against Inter in the group stages, you begin to realize how much of a big game player he is. If he's not wearing the captain's arm-band in less than five years, I'll wear a CR9 Madrid shirt in public.

9. In general, I was very proud of the Barca team today (except for the aforementioned Busquets). They kept fighting and fighting and fighting and gave it their all. It really was a heroic performance. Yes there were some bad touches and some ill-advised shots and some panicky moves in the second half, but you can't fault the effort and the desire. No team is going to win everything, but it really warms the heart when your team leaves it all out there. And Barca did. They can walk away with their head held high.

10. I really hate it when my sports teams lose. It is very, very cruel. European football especially -- you work, and work, and work, and then it comes apart because one or two moments of madness. And I have no need to tell you that this year, as a Barca fan, making (and winning) the final would've been extra special. Extra, extra, extra, extra, extra special.

Sigh.

Inter Will Be Close, But Not Close Enough: Champions League Semi Finals Preview

At this stage of the Champions League last year, I was confident that Barcelona would get through Chelsea. Importantly, I did not base my prediction on calculated, rational thought. Instead, what I recognized was that the Barcelona of last year were a team of destiny. I instinctively knew that we were bearing witness to history in the making, and that they would go through not because Chelsea weren't capable of knocking Barca out -- they decidedly were -- but because in a season like 2008-09, Barcelona had Fate (or God, if you prefer) on their side. Here's what I wrote:

My head wants to go with Chelsea, but my heart (and not just the Barca-fan part of my heart) says Barcelona. You just get the feeling watching them that they are a team of destiny; where things have fallen in place for one transient period; when the stars and planets have aligned, when Messi has remained fit, and Deco and Ronaldinho aren't around to wreak havoc in the dressing room; when Guardiola has worked magic beyond anyone's expectations in his first year; where each game has represented a tribute to the footballing gods, each an aesthetic and sporting symphony in its own right, each player partaking in this wonderful experience that we shall all remember for the rest of our lives, so that we can all tell our grandchildren: I was there when Messi and Xavi and Iniesta and Eto'o reduced opponents to tears and brought untold joy to the world, and indeed changed it in their own indomitable way; I was there when all excellence -- and not just the concept of excellence, but the very form of excellence, the way Plato meant the term -- found itself embodied in the Blaugrana; and perfection, that ever unattainable of goals for humankind, was just once flirted with, and brought within touching distance of us all, close enough so that we actually felt its presence, the same way Abelard and Heloise felt the other's presence, even if it was only in their imagination. You just get the feeling.

Well, that was last year.

Though Barcelona have reached those heights at various times this year, it has not been sustained or consistent. Moreover, the very point of being special is that it is unattainable with any regularity. Thus, they have come back to ground this year; a regular football team. Make no mistake, they are a very, very good football team, the world's best. But the difference this year is that they exist on the same plane as everyone else, which was patently not the case last year.

Why does this matter? Because considered logically and empirically, Inter have an excellent shot of beating Barcelona. Let's count the reasons why:

1. Barca are tired. The Inter game will be their twelfth in 40 days -- several of them high profile, high octane fixtures (three CL games, Valencia, Real, the derby). The fatigue has clearly caught up with them, as anyone who saw the nil-nil draw against Espanyol will attest.

2. Inter are exactly the type of team Barca hate playing against. Yes, Barca beat them in the group stages of the Champions League, fairly comfortably at that. But their physicality and rough-and-tumble nature, their ability to launch quick counter-attacks and score on the break, and their tactical acumen will test Barca to the limit.

3. Two words: Andres Iniesta. He hasn't been fit for more than a few weeks at a time this entire season. In essence, the decision to play him in last year's CL final against United was a Faustian bargain -- he hasn't really recovered from that injury all year. He's out for this tie, and his ability to play tiki-taka with Xavi in the center of the park is unparalleled, and will be missed. Especially against a team that will compress space like Inter with the likes of Cambiasso and Motta and Stankovic, players that can function in tight spaces are vital.

4. Pep's strange preference for Busquets over Yaya. Yes, yes, I've read all the accounts of Busquets being more positionally disciplined than Yaya, and that he is better at passing and getting attacks started. Even if that is true, it doesn't deflect from the fact that in these bruising encounters -- and make no mistake, Mourinho will make these as bruising as possible -- you need a tough S.O.B, which Yaya is. Yaya is also less likely to dive and roll around like he's been shot, and cost Barca with breakaways the other way.

5. Samuel Eto'o. I've been on record time and again as saying the Ibra swap was worth it. But I will say this: few players take as much pleasure in scoring against their old teams. Few players score as many big-game goals. And few players will strike as much fear in Barcelona's hearts if it's the last ten minutes at the Camp Nou, second leg, and Inter need just one goal to go through. Wouldn't you expect him to score, somehow, someway?

All this is to say, I'm worried. I'm very worried.

But what gets me from worrying too much is that every single time Guardiola has needed to have this team ready this season, they have been. Every single time Xavi or Messi have needed to drag this team with them, on their slight shoulders, they have. Every single time Barca have hit a so-called lull -- and only in their case is a 0-0 draw away to intense, local rivals categorized as a lull -- they have bounced back, and made their next opponents pay the price. Man for man, Barcelona are a better team. Of that I have no doubt.

If Inter go through, and it must be emphasized how plausible that outcome is, it won't be because they outplayed Barca. It'll be a freak goal or a ridiculous off-side or a stupid penalty or some such. Of course, that can happen. But put a gun to my head, and I have to pick Barca. Inter will be close, but not close enough.

PREDICTION: Barcelona go through 2-1 on aggregate.
_____________________________________________________________________________________

Quick thoughts on Bayern-Lyon. Not having watched an awful lot of these two teams outside European competition, I advise you to take my words with many grains of salt. My first inclination is to suggest that Lyon are simply a better team. Every time I watch Bayern, they are shambolic defensively. Every time I watch Lyon, I come away impressed with how organized they are, both going forward and tracking back. They've easily been the more impressive team in Europe this year, so I have to go with the form book.

PREDICTION: Lyon go through 4-2 on aggregate.

Champions League Quarter Finals Preview

In 1806, Napoleon's powerful military confronted a daunting coalition of European powers, including Prussia. Europe had been at war for the best part of fifteen years, and it would take close to another decade for the last vestiges of Napoleonic France to be soundly defeated in war. For a quarter of a century -- from the time of the French Revolution to Napoleon's final defeat -- France fought against myriad coalitions of European states, and never lost. Twenty five years against the rest of Europe. Alone.

Amongst those victories was a particularly comprehensive one against Prussia at Jena and Auerstadt. But this was no ordinary defeat. A young man by the name of Carl von Clausewitz served in the Prussian military, and saw first hand the awesome force that was the French army. Clausewitz, of course, would go on to become arguably history's most prominent theorist of war and, in his own way, changed the course of history.

A run of the mill defeat became seminal because of the lessons it imparted on the Prussians, who resolved to imitate the French war machine to beat it. The military was professionalized, and the General Staff instituted. Inculcating patriotism and nationalism became state policy. The levee en masse was imposed. Training was modernized. And meritocracy, rather than background or social position, became the primary way in which the officer class was constituted. The Prussian motto, it seems, was "If you can't beat 'em, be 'em. And then beat 'em."

It worked too. Between the middle of the nineteenth century and the middle of the twentieth, there was no more formidable fighting force in Europe than the Germans. German unification was achieved via a series of victories over France in 1870-1871. It was a most glorious victory; the German Empire was formally recognized in the majestic Hall of Mirrors at the famous Palace of Versailles, home to the French monarchy for centuries. It was the definition of adding insult to injury; a slap in the face that the French would not easily forget.

Why does all this matter? Simple. Imitation may well be the sincerest form of flattery, but there is something more functionally important about imitation: it sometimes works.

Which brings us to the Champions League. The obvious question, of course, is whether or not Arsenal can out-Barca Barca. Both clubs subscribe to the "receive, pass, offer" ethic of football, privileging intelligent movement off the ball to create space; neither is particularly physically imposing; both are often accused of trying too hard to pass it into the net; both can get predictable in attack, especially if there is a lack of viable width on offer; both are loathe to lift the ball more than three feet off the ground, and both play flowing, attractive football that fair-minded observers regard as the most pleasing to watch amongst top European leagues. The only problem for Arsenal is that Barcelona do all of that better than they do.

To be clear, I actually don't think this will be a cakewalk by any stretch, as some in the media are implying. For one thing, Barca simply haven't been at their best in the last two months -- the only complete games they've played in that period were the 4-0 wins against Sevilla in mid-January and against Stuttgart two weeks ago. In between we have seen various problems at various times, such as (a) imprecise passing from the midfield, (b) key injuries to Xavi, Abidal, Keita, Pique, and Dani Alves, (c) an over-reliance on Messi, and (d) a lack of movement from Ibrahimovic.

For another, Barca's pressing which works so well against other teams might not work to the same extent against Arsenal because they too are very comfortable on the ball in tight spaces (though I would submit that they haven't yet played a team that presses immediately after losing possession quite like Barca does).

And then, of course, there is Cesc Fabregas, one of the top ten players in the world having perhaps his best season. We are all intimately aware of the personal and emotional ties that both him and Henry will have in these games. Pep Guardiola will have an interesting decision to make with respect to Yaya Toure vs Busquets for this game. He has tended to prefer Busquets this year, despite Yaya offering more of a physical presence and greater athleticism. But in this game, I think Busquets might be a better bit, because he has the ability to harry players in the middle of the park which Barca will need against Fabregas. If he is allowed a free hand, Barca will be in trouble.

All those are important caveats to the promise of Barca winning this tie, but that is all they are: caveats. Look, anything can happen in cup football, especially with the away-goals rule. It takes one mistake, seriously one mistake, and you can be out. Plus, the only teams that seem capable of knocking Barca out of Europe have been English (Chelsea in 05, Liverpool in 07 and United in 08). It's not as if Barca losing is inconceivable.

But it would be surprising, nay, shocking. There is only one Arsenal player that would make it in Barca's first eleven, and that is Arshavin at LW over Henry/Pedro. Their defenders and goalkeeper (Almunia is worth at least one goal over these 180 minutes) are nowhere near as good as Barca's. Also keep in mind that Barca play (and beat) teams like Arsenal very regularly in La Liga, but Arsenal have never played anyone quite like this Barca team. And then there's the little matter of Leo Messi, who might well run riot against Clichy or Eboue or whatever combination Wenger dreams up.

And here's the kicker: Barca haven't been at their best for large parts of this season, but whenever push has come to shove, whenever they have needed a result, they have knocked it out of the park. They will be inspired, they will be pumped, and, I predict, they will show Arsenal how it's done by winning both legs.

Prediction: Barcelona win 5-2 on aggregate

As for the other games, here are my quick thoughts:

United-Bayern: I want Bayern to win because deep down, United are the only team left in the competition that I think can beat Barca (Chelsea and Real were the others). But honestly, they don't have a shot. I mean, I know the Ribery-Robben combination is supposed to be all that, but color me unimpressed. United are simply playing too well in Europe, and with the seconed leg at home, should go through comfortably, I think.

Prediction: United win 3-1 on aggregate

Inter-CSKA: An interesting one, isn't it? The only reason I'm even entertaining the thought of a CSKA win is their funky playing surface and the fact that their season is just getting underway, so they'll be fresher (though the flipside of that is that they mightn't be in a rhythm like some of the other teams). But Jose-coached teams very rarely lose to teams weaker than them on paper, and he'll have his guys prepared. It won't be pretty, but they'll go through methinks.

Prediction: Inter win 1-0 on aggregate

Lyon-Bordeaux: I really have no effing idea. First of all, the only time I watch French teams is in the Champions League, so I really don't feel qualified to speak on them. Second, intra-country ties in the Champions League always end up kind of weird (like the Liverpool-Chelsea goalathon last year -- 12 goals??). I think Bordeaux are the better team overall, but simply on the basis of the last knockout stage, where Lyon dominated Madrid and Bordeaux barely squeaked past Olymiakos, I'm going with Lyon.

Prediction: Lyon win 3-3 on away goals

That Nasri Goal

What a night. It's been a long time since Arsenal have had a big win against respectable opponents or anyone actually - it was their first win with a 5 goal margin since the very first game of the season. And they should've score a couple more - there were glaring misses my Arshavin and Sagna.

Arsenal deserved to win but they weren't always in control, Porto had the opportunity to get right back in the game but they didn't and Arsenal grabbed their opportunity by the balls. Quick and effective.

But it doesn't matter that they weren't solid at the back, or that Porto lacked incisiveness, or that Clichy was once again poor, or that Campbell looked old. Arsenal won 5-0 and had fun doing it, what more can you ask for. They huddled together in the end looking energized and enjoying each others company, that made the win all the more sweeter.

Best of all, Nasri scored this most sumptuous goal:



Breathtaking stuff. There's a reason why they once called the new Zidane. (Then again they'd hail any technically gifted French footballer of Algerian descent as the new Zidane. I wonder if he had all the new Maradonas play against the new Zidanes, who'd win?)

Quote Of The Day

Come on, Zizou. It's been four years. Let it go already.

Of course I reproach myself. But, if I say 'sorry', I would also be admitting that what he himself did was normal. And for me it was not normal. Things happen on the pitch. It's happened to me many times. But I could not stand it there. It is not an excuse, but my mother was ill. She was in hospital. This people did not know. But it was a bad time. More than once they insulted my mother and I never responded. But there ... and it happened. And to apologise for this? If it was Kaká, a regular guy, a good guy, of course I would have apologised. But to this one? I apologise to football, to the fans, to the team, but to him I cannot. Never, never. It would be to dishonour me. I'd rather die. There are evil people. And I don't even want to hear those guys speak.

By the way, has anyone actually figured out what Materazzi said to Zidane? I've heard the "son of a terrorist whore" story as well as the "I hope you and your family die an ugly death" story as well as the "Keep your shirt, I'll give mine to your whore of a sister" story.

Anyway, here's the video, once more.

Video Of The Day

Hahaha. Classic.



Two related points. One, there now appears to be a title race in England, a real one (though Arsenal have to beat Stoke for this to be true). Second, England's back four is shaping up to be an utter disaster for the World Cup. Quarter final exit again?

Zizou The Magician

I never tire of watching Zidane videos and this one, which I came across on Guardian's awesome weekly youtube post, is breathtaking. Enjoy.

Man United Fans Don't Actually Believe This Crap, Do They?

I read this comment on the Guardian blogs, the first one in the thread, and almost threw up in my mouth:

Manchester United have the most effective player in the world.

I wouldn't swap Rooney for any other player.

That's not even blinkered. He's younger and better than anybody else you put anywhere near him.

A few comments down, I came across this:

Never write a player off. Darren Fletcher, my god, how did this happen? It's almost beyond belief what's happened to this guy. Guardiola knows, if Fletcher plays in the final Barca are f**cked.

I stopped reading after that. But quick question to the United fans out there: do you guys actually believe this shit, or are you just being euphoric?

Atletico Madrid Help Crosstown Rivals, Hand Barcelona First Defeat Of The Season

Ugh. Unfortunately, the title race got a whole lot more interesting today. Let's talk about why, and reflect on the game and its implications.

1. Injuries and suspensions. This is not an excuse, simply a statement of fact. Barca's backline was decimated: Pique and Marquez suspended; Dani Alves, Abidal, Chygryinski, and Yaya Toure (a DMF who is capable of slotting in at center back, just ask Cristiano Ronaldo) injured. Adding injury to injury, Keita got injured within five minutes of the game. The term "makeshift" would be too kind to the back four Barca fielded today -- Puyol (sort of returning from a knock himself) and Milito (just returning to regular action after two years out) as center backs, Maxwell the left back and Jeffren (a winger who occasionally slots in at right back) replacing Dani Alves.

Now, normally injuries matter only to Barca if it's one of Messi or Xavi out. I wouldn't go so far as saying everyone else is replaceable, but Barca remain Barca as long as those two are in the team. And they were today. However, the sheer weight of absences meant that the backline was disorganized and frequently screwed up the off-side trap -- as evinced by Forlan's first goal, and the gilt-edged chance that Kun Aguero somehow missed in the first fifteen minutes. Both Jeffren and Maxwell had shockers, and both should've been sent off; Jeffren was saved because the ref was one of those "well, you're already on a yellow, so I'm not going to call you for a yellow-card foul you just committed even though it was obvious enough to be seen from the moon because I'm not man enough to give you a second yellow" refs. And Maxwell? Wow, that was a terrible game.

Moreover, the injuries to the backline had a massive influence on the way Barca went forward, in two ways. First, since there was no Pique, Marquez or, to a lesser extent, Chygryinski, there was no ball-laying CB. The ball-playing CB is key in Barca's system because it alleviates pressure from the midfield, and pushes the opposition back, lest they subject Barca to too much pressure in their third. Because Barca didn't have that today, Atletico pinned Barca back, and forced a lot of long balls that went nowhere.

This was bad enough, but the Barca attack suffered hugely because of the absence of Dani Alves. In fact, this was such a big issue that it deserves its own bullet point...

2. Alves is crucial because of the width he provides on the right. It allows Messi some space to operate in, and draws the opposition full backs to the flank, allowing the Messi/Xavi/Iniesta triumvirate to play their intricate passing game near the penalty box. Without Alves, and no real threat down the right, full backs just tucked in and crowded the center. It was like watching Arsenal hopelessly knock it around, there simply wasn't a way through.

It was a similar story on the left; Henry didn't even get off the bench, and Pedro played like utter crap. No space = no threat = no goals.

3. Barca played badly, separately from the matter of injuries. I have never seen Xavi misplace so many passes in my life...seriously. The dude was taken off when Barca were trailing, something I've never seen. I've never seen Messi's touch desert him to this extent. Other than a few pointless forays straight into the heart of the Atletico defense, he had a shocker. I've only very rarely seen so many passes from midfield go absolutely nowhere. Ibra, other than the goal, was absent again. The bottom line is that the whole team were off their game today.

On the one hand, you're inclined to say: it's okay, it happens. You can't be perfect every game. On the other hand, this was a winnable game, and if Barca were even 15% better, they could've taken it.

4. By the same token, credit must be given to Atletico. They played well, very well. The standouts were their center backs (especially Perea, perhaps the best player on the pitch today), Kun Aguero (the term "constant threat" comes to mind, he was like a mosquito buzzing around and evading capture), and Reyes. Simao knocked in a fantastic free-kick and that was that. And despite conceding before half-time, and thus making a game of it, you always felt they were in control.

5. Barca were not going to go the entire season undefeated, but there are good times for losses and bad times for losses, and this was definitely the latter. Real beat an earnest Xerez yesterday -- who gamely held on until half time, and then fell apart to lose 3-0 at home -- to draw within two points. Barca's loss today means that they are way too close for comfort.

On paper, next week's fixture list favors Barca, as they play host to bottom-third Racing, while Real host Villareal (who've had a massively disappointing season but on their day can still hurt you). But I'm suddenly not feeling too good about this, especially with the injuries piling on and the pressure of a European campaign to restart soon.

Pep, it's your move.

Um, Refs Aren't Really Allowed To Do This, Are They?

Look, getting in the way is one thing, and happens all the time. But back-heeling it? Come on, ref. As Sid Lowe tweeted, nice touch.

Stuttgart? Yes, Stuttgart

Give me a moment, will you?

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

Good times. Seriously, I know all those cliches about hatched chickens and what not, but seriously, just put Barcelona in the pot for the last eight so we can get the draw started early. The only suspense is how bad Barca will make Hleb feel for being useless, not learning Spanish or Catalan, and bitching about the team and his place on the bench after he left.

I'm actually super excited about some of these ties, given that this year, the quality was overwhelmingly in the top spots in each group (last year, by contrast, Chelsea, Inter, Arsenal and Real were all second place in their group, making the ties almost inevitably tasty). The headline event will, of course, be Jose Mourinho's return to Stamford Bridge. Though I don't know who I'm going to root for -- this will be the football equivalent of an India-Australia cricket match -- I do know it's going to be captivating. My inclination is to suggest that Chelsea will be too strong for Inter, but the tie is two months from now, and who knows what's happening at that time?

The other headline event is, of course, United and Milan. Milan are playing pretty well, probably the best they've played in three years. Pato is getting up close to that "world class" level, Ronaldinho has shed some weight, and they look more organized as a general rule. Plus, without Ronaldo, I don't see where United's goals are going to come from against top teams in Europe.

Reserving the right to change my opinion closer to the date when injuries, form etc all will become clear, here are my quick predictions on the last 16 of the Champions League:

1. Barcelona vs. Stuttgart -- please.

2. Inter vs. Chelsea -- Chelsea relatively comfortably (say 3-1 on aggregate).

3. Lyon vs Real Madrid -- Real in a high scoring tie (say 5-3 on aggregate).

4. Milan vs. Man United -- Milan squeaking by (say 2-1 on aggregate).

5. Porto vs. Arsenal -- Arsenal on away goals (say 2-2 on aggregate).

6. Sevilla vs. CSKA -- The weather gets Sevilla (say 1-0 on aggregate).

7. Olympiakos vs. Bordeaux -- Bordeaux in a canter (say 3-0 on aggregate).

8. Bayern vs. Fiorentina -- An absolute toss-up. Really have no idea. Let's just give it to Bayern because I feel bad about what happened last year. Bayern on away goals (2-2 on aggregate).

Thoughts?

Real Groups Of Death Have Four Good Teams, Not Three Very Good Teams

I just watched the World Cup draw on ESPN2. First of all, let me say that Charlize Theron is fine.

Second, I get very annoyed when I hear commentators and analysts instantly opine on which is the so-called Group of Death. Mainly because they're wrong. Before I explain, here's the draw:

Group A: South Africa, Mexico, Uruguay, France

Group B: Argentina, Nigeria, South Korea, Greece

Group C: England, USA, Algeria, Slovenia

Group D: Germany, Australia, Ghana, Serbia

Group E: Holland, Japan, Cameroon, Denmark

Group F: Italy, New Zealand, Paraguay, Slovakia

Group G: Brazil, North Korea, Ivory Coast, Portugal

Group H: Spain, Honduras, Chile, Switzerland

Looking at that, the analysts immediately said that Group G is the Group of Death, mainly because they've heard of Cristiano Ronaldo and Didier Drogba. This is stupid. Portugal simply aren't a very good team. They really struggled through qualifying -- even with Crystiano -- and unlike Argentina and France, who also struggled, there's no upside there. I don't see anyone other than Brazil and Cote d'Ivoire getting through there.

More generally, groups of death normally take place when you have absolutely no freebies. North Korea is patently a freebie. There are actually two groups of death for next year: Group B and Group D. None of the eight teams in those groups can really be thought of as the top favorites for the entire tournament, but not one of the twelve matches in those groups is easily predictable. Not one.

I will say this about Group G: it's hard enough getting through that group, but then when you consider that the first knock-out game for the teams getting through will be either Spain or Chile...wow. If one of Brazil or Spain mess up in their groups, and somehow finish second, can you imagine a round of 16 knockout between those two? Yikes.

Oh, and Italy? Lucky buggers. Though it bears mentioning Paraguay are not an easy out.

Real Win Respect, But Barcelona Win Three Points

Forty one. That was the total number of fouls in the clasico between Barcelona and Real Madrid at the Camp Nou. And you know what? Barca did just fine. So often castigated for being too much beauty and not enough beast, Barca showed they can win (a) rugby matches, (b) when they're not playing especially well, (c) when the opposition takes it to them, and (d) when they play with ten men for half an hour (thanks, Busquets!).

Today's 1-0 win was strange for a number of reasons. First of all, I'm struggling to recall a game in which Barca relied on Puyol and Pique to the extent that they did. Normally, when Barca win games, it's because of the control they exert in the midfield through Xaviniesta, and the constant threat in the final third provided by the front three.

Today, both those aspects were absent. We didn't see dominance in the midfield because Pep stupidly decided to play Iniesta as a winger, leaving both Pedro and Ibra on the bench to start. This despite the fact that Xaviniesta have shown time and again that when they are side by side in the center of midfield, they are peerless. When one of them is absent, however, things can get ragged.

Moreover, the threat from the front three was nullified by an excellent (and sometimes dirty) Madrid defense and midfield. They pressured the ball from the first whistle -- Jose, you might want to take notes from this game for the next time you play Barca -- and, especially in the first half, gave Barca no room to breathe. And when Barca did find a little bit of space, Madrid simply committed tactical fouls (they committed 25 fouls in all, their entire backline other than Segio Ramos picked up a yellow, Lass picked up two in the second half alone, and even Marcelo got one for good measure).

What this meant was that Barca simply did not get going until the second half, when Real's intensity dropped off a little. Real actually threatened to score more than Barca, a strange occurrence if there ever was one. But Puyol and Pique (and Valdes, no doubt, with a crucial one-on-one save from Crystiano in the first half) would simply not allow it. Tackle after desperate tackle, lunge after last-second lunge, they were truly magnificent. Puyol, especially, showed everyone what a true leader does in big games: man up. What a performance, easily the man of the match.

It needed to be one too. Despite my well-documented hatred for Crystiano, I have to say, seeing him and Kaka together on the counter-attack had me covering my face in horror a couple of times. When Pellegrini gets his selection right (he must understand that with Kaka and Crystiano in the same team, only one of Higuain, Benzema and Raul can play, and it must be Higuain when he is fit), they are an incredibly scary team going forward. And when Busquets insanely handled to get his second yellow -- I have absolutely no idea what he was thinking -- I feared the worst.

I needn't have. On being reduced to ten men, Barca became galvanized and played as a unit. Xaviniesta dropped a little deeper, and Messi defended well into Barca's own half. It was almost heroic to see them repel attack after attack, corner after corner. When they did win the ball, they did everything they could to keep it, ensuring control in tight spaces and showing that skill will always beat strength. From the 60th minute on, it was just about counting the minutes down and keeping the one goal advantage.

A word about the goal and Ibra in general. Pretty much as soon as he stepped on to the pitch, Barca looked better. Henry was completely and utterly ineffective in his fifty-odd minute stint, again raising questions of Pep's selection. If Ibra was fit enough to play, he was fit enough to start. Why didn't he? Only Pep knows. But the bottom line is that when the substitution was made, space opened up, the passing in the final third became crisper, and Barca actually started looking like Barca. And the goal? Nothing else to say, except great run, expert finish (kudos, also, to Dani Alves for a pinpoint cross, because really, he did bugger all for the rest of the game). Ibra, a big-game bottler? Right.

So Barca, still unbeaten in La Liga, go top of the table with 30 points from 12 games, with Madrid two back and Sevilla a further two back. They owe that position mainly to their center backs, but also to a team spirit and ethos that simply refused to give in. Messi, especially, typified this approach, with an extraordinary work rate (and coming back after injury, no less) and control that kept Real to 38% possession. It was a great all-round team performance against a fired up Real team, who showed that last season was an aberration, and that the gap in quality between the two will be much smaller this year. Which, I suppose, is a fair return on 250 million Euros.

With Champions League Future In Balance, Barcelona Put On Masterful Performance

To put it simply, that was the best Barcelona have played since the Champions League final against Manchester United. Against a strong Inter side -- without Sneijder, to be fair -- Barca bossed the game, and effectively ended it within half an hour. And all this without their two brightest stars, Lionel Messi and Zlatan Ibrahimovic, and their first-choice defensive midfielder, Yaya Toure. And to have conjured that performance when a draw or a loss could have seriously left their qualification for the final sixteen in great peril? Nothing like it.

So how did they manage such a comprehensive win against such a strong side under such trying circumstances? Let's count the ways:

1. As always with Barca, the truly special performances are under-girded by the Xavi and Iniesta partnership. The level of understanding and touch between these two is telepathic. You feel like they are the types that will force their kids to hang out and dress the same when they organize day trips to the zoo, they're that close.

The interesting thing is that Iniesta, as the lineup had it, was supposed to be playing right forward, or the Messi role, in Barca's traditional 4-3-3. Only, they didn't actually play that way. In effect, Barca played a 4-4-2, with Iniesta tucking in to midfield, and leaving space on the right for Dani Alves to run into. Poor old Chivu had nothing to do for half the game.

But more to the point, the Iniesta-Xavi midfield was reinstated. Because of injuries to Henry and Ibrahimovic, among others, Iniesta has often played the left forward role this season, which he does adequately but not particularly well (often drifting in, and bunching things up in the final third, when above all else Barca require space to play in). And plus, when Iniesta is taken away from Xavi, the latter looks like someone shot his dog. Seriously, he looks completely lost without his partner in crime. It's quite cute actually. But anyway, the way they controlled the game would have seemed awfully familiar to United fans (and Real fans, and Bayern fans and, well, every other team's fans too).

2. Pedro! What a display. The young forward has really grown into his role this season (think hired assassin, either off the bench or as a replacement for one of the injured starters). He's now scored ten goals in ten games in all competitions. He owned Maicon the whole damn ninety minutes. His pace, movement, skill on the ball, and finishing (getting Barca's second, capping a scything and poetic move that left the commentators breathless) were a joy to watch. He really is the long-term answer to Barca's left-wing issue; I'd much rather see January transfer money being spent on a central midfielder to spell Xavi and Iniesta, particularly since Yaya and Keita will be out for the African Cup of Nations in January.

3. The back four all did their part. Puyol and Pique put out whatever very limited threats Inter engendered in the second half (there were none in the first half, none whatsoever), once again dividing their duties (Puyol doing man-marking and scurrying, Pique taking care of aerial threats and bringing the ball out, and even scoring the first despite having his shirt tugged harder than a fourteen year-old boy tugs...never mind, I'm not finishing that sentence). Abidal had a phenomenal game, after a couple of early jitters for which he could be forgiven (dude just came back from swine flu, for God's sake). And Dani Alves wreaked havoc on the right side, providing the assist for Pedro's goal, and doing a good job defensively too. You can obviously not base too much on one game, but he seriously outplayed Maicon today.

4. And finally, Pep. Anyone else would have panicked. Anyone else, with the dip in form and fitness over the last month, have started acting impulsively (cough *Rafa* cough). Anyone else would have been highly tempted to start at least one of Messi or Ibra, particularly since both were fit enough to be on the bench.

But you, sir, displayed the calm confidence in your team that no one else did. Because you know them, and trust them, and see them every day, you knew the guys you had would do the job.

I bow down to you, sir. May you live a long life and have many children and carry on the Guardiola name.

Honestly, when Barca play the way they did today, few teams can hang with them. Chelsea are probably the only team that can, based on their physical prowess and the organization. I thought Jose would be able to replicate that organization with Inter, but they were ripped apart today, cut like ribbons. They ended up resorting to thuggish fouls (they should have had at least two more yellows shown, and probably a red too), which was a disappointment.

Anyway, Barca are now basically through. The only way they won't get to the last sixteen is if there's a result in the Inter-Rubin game and Dynamo beat them by more than two goals. More likely, however, is the prospect of them not only going through, but also topping the group. This will require either a win in Ukraine, or a draw and the Rubin-Inter game (in Milan) ending in anything other than a Rubin win.

Order, ladies and gents, has been restored. Phew.